Parenting

Brave bully victim: How he fought back

Brave bully victim: How he fought back

Schoolboy Dylan Raven is on a mission to stop the menace plaguing our kids.

Karen Raven thought her son Dylan was just being a typical teenage boy when he’d retreat to his room after school every day. At dinner time, he’d eat a little bit, then disappear again for the night.

“I just thought, at that age, maybe it was hormones,” says Karen. What the Broken Hill mother-of-two didn’t realise was that her son was the victim of extreme bullying at school.

“They’d say I’m ugly, I’m gay, I’m stupid – anything they could think of,” says Dylan, who explains that the verbal bullying, which began in his first year of high school, quickly escalated to frightening physical violence.

“I had my head smashed into a brick wall, and one science lesson I had a cable tied around my throat and tightened to the point where I could hardly breathe,” recalls the now 17-year-old student. “I was choked while I was standing in the canteen line, too.”

Tragically, for many bullied teens, ending their own life often seems like the only way to stop the torment.

“I did have those feelings,” admits Dylan. “But I didn’t do anything, because I know how it can affect people and families.”

Karen only found out about her son’s troubles when her cousin, who was looking after Dylan while he was sick, took him to the hospital. When asked about school, Dylan had a panic attack and revealed all.

“I was completely devastated,” says Karen. “It got me down that badly I was having sessions with a psychologist.”

It was through a psychologist that Dylan learned to open up about his experiences, although he admits, “It was really hard.”

Now in Year 11, Dylan’s days as a victim are over. Having moved schools in Year Nine, his grades have improved and he is much happier. He’s also helping others who aren’t so lucky, through his online Say No To Bullying campaign, which offers advice and support.

“It’s a good feeling knowing that you’re actually helping people – not only the victims but also the bullies – to realise the severity of what they’re doing,” says Dylan.

His message to other victims is simple. “If you don’t feel comfortable talking to your parents, talk to a close friend – tell them what has been going on and how you’re feeling.”

Dylan’s mum and his twin sister Shelby couldn’t be prouder of the stand he’s taken, and Karen urges other parents to encourage conversation with their children.

“Speak to them when they come home from school. If you notice one little change in the way they usually are, query them about it.”

Visit sn2bullying.blogspot.com.au to find out more and join Dylan’s campaign.

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