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One very brave Aussie nine-year-old Milla, has shared his experiences of growing up feeling like he’s in the wrong body and asked for acceptance via a video shared by his loving mum.
Brisbane Mum Renee Fabish decided to ask for support for her child by sharing Milla’s story through a moving video posted to her Facebook page.
“I just want people to accept me for who I am,” Milla says in the video that has since gone viral with over 3.7 million views.
Renee first shared the video less than two weeks ago, accompanying the post with the explanation:
“It explains some major changes that are underway for Milla and our family… Milla needs our support now more than ever!!”
Renee shares a slideshow of images of Milla as growing up, which are accompanied by captions, telling Milla’s story.
“From as young as two Milla would refer to herself as girl-boy – a girl that liked boy things from very early on,” Renee explains.
“Milla insisted on wearing boys, undies PJs and dress ups – we didn’t have a problem with that.
“Everyone told us it was just a phase they’d say ‘she’s just a tomboy – she’ll grow out of it’.”
Left: Milla as a little girl always preferred to play dress-ups in boys clothes. Right: Milla is much happier now living as a boy.
It wasn’t as simple as that though. Gender dysphoria is not something children simply grow out of, but rather a recognised medical condition in which the diagnosed patient rejects the gender into which they were born – often from a very young age.
Milla is lucky then to have such understanding and supportive parents.
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“One day Milla came to me in tears saying is there any medicine I could buy to turn her into a boy,” Renee said.
“She started making comments like ‘why was I born like this?’, ‘I want to be a boy – not just look like one. I want to be a real boy’.”
Renee explains that was when she started to become really concerned for the wellbeing of her child: “I could see Milla slowly becoming withdrawn and depressed. She was going to bed in tears every night.”
Milla was tormented by the thought of impending puberty and couldn’t bear the idea of growing breasts.
“She became increasingly distressed at the thought of growing boobs she said ‘If I grow boobs I am going to cut them off’,” Renee explains in the heart-wrenching video.
Milla always asked to get her hair cut short.
With 30 per cent of young transgender people who don’t get treatment attempting suicide and another 50 per cent self-harm, Renee decided to take action.
“We are not willing to let our child become part of those statistics,” she declares.
“Her gender assigned at birth does not align with how she feels inside – Milla was born female but her brain identifies as male,” Renee explains in the video.
In the hopes of helping people understand what gender dysphoria is, she continues: “This is something that is in his genetic makeup it hasn’t been caused or encouraged by our parenting.”
“It is not something she was talked into and it is not something she can be talked out of – it is what it is.”
“We have no doubt in our minds that Milla is fully invested in her plight to be recognised as a boy – the only thing that has changed for us is pronouns – we support him wholeheartedly.”
Milla faces the camera in the video, asking for acceptance and support.
So Milla then steps in, using the video as a platform to introduce himself to the world as a boy, saying:
“I just want people to accept me for who I am. I’m lucky that I have an awesome family who support me 100 per cent,” he says to the camera.
“I have decided I want to take the next step from today I want to live and be known as a boy.
Milla concludes: “I hope I have your support.”
Isabelle – the girl who grew up in the wrong body
Australian children wishing to change gender can now be treated with puberty blockers which help delay the onset of puberty. The benefit of this is it can buy the child time to think about whether gender reassignment is really what they want before the unchangeable effects of puberty kick in.
If they wish to access gender-changing hormones though, they must first go through not one, but two, long, drawn-out legal procedures to establish their ability to consent to the treatment.
This drawn out court process can be a great expense though – both financially in the cost but also in the amount of time taken. The latter can of course further delay the child’s treatment and cause further irreversible development into the gender that they do not identify with.
Milla with her supportive mum Renee.
With the increase in numbers of children and parents coming forward to seek help, the pressure is on for the law, as it currently stands, to change. For this to happen there would have to be a test case taken to the full bench of the Family Court – it would then have to be taken all the way to the High Court.
Family Court Chief Justice Diana Bryant told the ABC’s Four Corners: “I’d like to see the High Court have the opportunity to examine these kinds of cases, these gender identity cases and to decide whether or not the court has to be involved at all.”
Renee says that since her son took the momentous step, of choosing to identify as a boy, he is now extremely happy.
“All we can do is equip our son with the skills necessary to cope with small minded people,” she said.
“Being transgender is not a choice – trust me it’s not a life you would choose for your child.”
“Our child deserves the right to be happy like any other.”
**If you or anyone you know is in need of support, contact Lifeline Australia on 13 11 14 or Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 or visit BeyondBlue. **
